Thursday, May 19, 2011

Dear Angel,

So, here I am listening to the only recording I have of his voice. Was talking to liyan,
"It's only been a week!" she says, "Ok, fine, 2.. You're not gonna last 4 months.."
I wonder too...
"So just do whatever makes you happy!"
I guess...
What do you think angel? 4 months sure is a long time.. But I haven't felt like spoiling anyone for so long. It's like the only thing that I look forward to each day is his email. That anticipation actually wakes me up, keeps me from going back to bed. Hmm, something that gets me out of my bed, that sure makes a difference doesn't it?
Edwin says we're all gooey.. Is that a bad thing? I don't think we are.. Was I ever like this before? I thought I was always the cool one..
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Took me so much to type out "I miss you".. Drained me of all my strength that night, it's like me finally admitting to liking him, telling him. That makes me feel vulnerable and exposed. I don't like being exposed. I like keeping things to myself, with only me knowing what I'm feeling. Besides Edwin, didn't dare to let anyone else know how I feel. Seems a lil too fast again. What are you up to again Charlotte dear? Haven't you learn well from your last mistake??
Practicing cooking, buying chocolates, writing cards.. What else?
------
I crave for his smile which drifted miles away
miss his warmth from what seems like yesterday
So near, yet so far..
In this rainy May,
I pray, for
My love won't fade away.

Love,
Charl

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